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Couple celebrates 75 years of marriage
Bruce Matlock
Lois and Paul Cartner recently celebrated their 75th wedding anniversary.
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Published: January 11, 2009
Paul Cartner set his sights on Lois Prather the first time he saw her.
That was in 1932, when Paul boarded a school bus at a countywide commencement for all the high school students.
Lois Smoot, sitting in the front of the bus, yelled at Cartner, who struck his head on the bus.
"We were all sitting in the back, and he hardly stopped. He came straight to the back of the bus," Lois Cartner said.
Paul wanted Lois to change buses and ride home on the one he drove. The bus had an additional seat beside the driver's seat, and Paul sat Lois on the second seat.
The next day, Sunday, Lois walked into services at Society Baptist Church with Paul.
"We kind of starting going together," she said, explaining that she liked his sense of humor and his strong commitment to his faith.
Two years later, after double dating with another couple, Paul and Lois decided to make it official.
They were married on Jan. 6, 1934, in the parsonage at Front Street Baptist Church. She was 18 and he was 19.
Seventy-five years later, the Cartners are still together. He's 94 and she's 93.
The "in sickness and in health" part of their marriage vows, taken 75 years ago, is a constant part of their lives.
Paul suffered a stroke 13 years ago and hasn't walked since. Lois is his full-time caregiver.
Neither realized what they were getting into 75 years ago, she said. While living at home, neither realized the country was in the midst of a depression.
"You couldn't get a job," she said.
The young couple struggled and made it as many other rural folks did in those days — by farming.
"We grew our own food and I canned," she said. "We didn't buy anything other than sugar and coffee."
Farming wasn't an easy life or a safe one.
Within the first two years of their marriage, Paul was helping his father cut wood when a chip on the steel wedge flew back deep into his left eye.
Doctors at Davis Hospital used a magnet to pull the chip out, but couldn't save the eye.
Life on the farm could be adventurous, as well. The family used a horse and buggy to go from field to field, and during one outing, Paul hit a bump and the buggy overturned, dumping Lois into a patch of briars.
Despite the danger and misadventures, Paul and Lois stuck it out farming for a few more years.
About 20 years into their marriage, they moved to a home closer to Statesville and both went to work at public jobs.
Their son and only child, J.P., was born in 1940, and Lois waited until he was older before going to work.
Lois became a full-time textile worker and her husband worked at a variety of mills and drove a truck.
Both worked hard at their jobs and their marriage until Paul's stroke in 1995.
"I've taken care of him since," she said.
Shirley Thorne, a family friend, said she's not surprised at Lois' devotion to taking care of Paul or that their marriage has lasted 75 years.
'Sometimes love does conquer all — a love eye, a dump in a briar patch and paralysis," she said.
Lois said their milestone anniversary was celebrated, but in a low-key manner.
"They kind of slipped up on me and didn't tell me about it," she said. "I hadn't even combed my hair."
About three or four families and relatives attended the celebration.
The small nature of the party was just fine with Lois.
"I appreciate everybody being here," she said.
Lois said there's no real secret to making a marriage last as long as hers. She credits their faith with helping them through the tough times.
"The Good Lord just kept us together," she said. "It hasn't all been easy, but we made it."
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Lois and Paul Cartner were married Jan. 6, 1934.
They have one son, J.P., who lives with his wife, Judy, in Davie County.
They have one grandson, Brad, who lives in Tennessee.
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